Choose happiness ;-)


A week ago we, my future husband and I went to the compulsory marriage preparation weekend that is offered to all couples intending to get hitched within the next 6 months. There we met a variation of couples just like ourselves. One couple who had decided just 3 months ago to get married in December! Couples that would be getting married scattered across the coming months and couples who evidently would not be getting married at all.

I was sort of worried about the weekend. I had heard that you would be sure when you walked out there whether or not you were really ready and whether or not you really wanted to marry the person sitting next you.

Getting there I was already in a foul mood. One because of a misunderstanding that had occurred that day and two because like I said I was a bit worried about the weekend. What if we walked out of there that weekend deciding 5 months before our impending nuptials that we’d actually made a terrible mistake? I’d heard one too many times that living together was not marriage and all the other negatives that fear was spreading through my vein like a good old venom.

I was sure that I wanted to create a future with him for the next couple of decades but would he be so sure when he walked out of there?

Lucky for me, the discussions of money, children, anger management, love making and the awkward birth control conversations had already been discussed between us  as a couple at home so there were no nasty surprises there! We still managed to bicker about the same things we bicker about at home about which didn’t faze me in the least and once the most intense part of it was over, I realised that we were still just ourselves. That nothing had changed except maybe our communication skills. We were both feeling unbelievably happy albeit exhausted.

I am happy. He is happy. And everyone that we met there except for that single couple at the end of the weekend was happy. We fed off each other’s good vibes. We laughed that whole time and I learned that love is a decision made everyday and so is happiness. You have to decide that you are going to be happy. You can’t just feel it. Decide it!

So the old saying was true I guess … Laugh and the world laughs with you, cry and hopefully they’ll be tears of joy because the world will be laughing at you!


4 thoughts on “Choose happiness ;-)

  1. I never heard of a whole weekend of pre-marriage counseling. Very interesting. I’m glad you made it through with flying colors.

    One lesson I learned during marriage counseling that served me well (my ex, not so much): treat your spouse at least as well as you would a house guest. That one simple rule made me think about doing little things for him that I normally wouldn’t do, but would always do for a causal guest (offer him coffee, ask if he needs anything when I’m going to the kitchen, things like that). It’s just common courtesy that we often forget to extend to our loved ones because we get used to them.

    Okay, enough with Lorna’s Advice Column… 😉

    • thanks for the advice! I’ll remember that one. He’s so good at offering me a cup of tea when I walk through the front door I sometimes forget that it’s a act out of courtesy to me. Going in the little book of advice I’m making!

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